Dad just called to tell me he has diabetes.
I started crying as soon as we hung up, after about an hour of conversation; none of which involved me crying. He didn't want to tell me about it because he knew I'd be upset, but wanted to tell me before I see him in Vegas. I just. I didn't want to have him hear me upset, so I held on.
I guess everyone has those relatives they never know. The ones that die right before you're born, or right after. My Mother's brother Carl had diabetes, and I never knew him. He lived by himself, and this was back in the day when they didn't have meters or testing supplies I think, and he got sick one day and no one found him.
I had this sobbing conversation with Mom, where she couldn't tell half the things I was saying, and I just kept telling her 'Dad lives alone'.
Some days I feel like such an ass about Dad. I love him, and I've never really lived with him except these few months here and there for summer break when I was a kid, and alternating holidays in the winter. And I get so angry sometimes because out in Vegas there's this girl he used to date, who has a kid, and he spends time with the kid. I like him, he's sweet, and he's reasonably well behaved, and I call him my little brother because there was this point where it seemed like they might get married. But they didn't and Dad still sometimes winds up taking care of the kid, and one day it just hit me that no matter how much time I spend with Dad from here on out, even if I moved in with him, I'd never have spent that much time as Joey has gotten. I call sometimes, and he's taking Joey to McDonalds or a movie because school let out early, and I think I'd have given my eye teeth for that. I'd have cut off my own hand if Dad hadn't always lived at least one state away and I got to see him for more than snatches at a time.
And now he's sick, and all I can think about is this Uncle I've never known, and feel bitterly jealous again about this kid who has no claim on him at all has had more of his time than I ever will.
Edit: 6:18. An hour after writing that I feel despicably petty.
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About Me
- Bentochan
- Likes Batman, apples, books, chocolate, and has never met a dog that she didn't have to pet. However, she has learned that Jellyfish do not want to be petted. Neither do cacti. And vampires are awesome.
Books I am Reading
- The Portrait of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde
2 comments:
They've had diabetes testing supplies, etc., for decades; my father was diagnosed with diabetes in 1972, and with blood glucose monitoring and diabetes management he remained healthy and active for decades.
Untreated, diabetes can be a serious illness. Treated, it's wholly controllable for the vast majority of those who have it. And today there are even more options, including inhalable insulin, etc., that offer additional alternative for many diabetics.
I can understand your concern, but I don't think this is anywhere nearly as severe as you think it is. Believe me, your dad will have no trouble so long as he does what his doctor advises.
I'll second Cliff on that. A good friend of mine developed diabetes while he and I were still in grade school. He monitored it and did what he was supposed to do and he's still alive and fine thirty something years later. Just make sure your dad takes the disease seriously and looks after himself.
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