Sunday, October 17, 2010

A 26 year wait, over.

A lot of you probably know I'm adopted. Since I was twenty I've been looking for my biological family- with no luck. I made a lot of phone calls and sent a few letters but it all amounted to was disconnected numbers. Thursday afternoon I tried googling again, trying some new numbers. The first one went to a disconnected line, the next rang and rang and then someone answered.

I asked for my biological mother and the she said she'd go look for her out in the yard. About two minutes later she was on the line.

It's still blowing my mind. I looked for them for six years and it was just as easy as calling the right number at the right time. I talked to my biological mother for an hour that day and a few hours later my sister called- I have a sister and three brothers- she lives in Hawaii and is in the Navy, two of the brothers live here, and another is in the Army. One of my brothers who lives here has called me a few times. I'm supposed to go down to see them soonish...

Right now it's so much. Every time the phone rings I jump up to grab it- who's calling now? Who's texting? Is it one of them?

Tuesday, October 12, 2010


I used to know this guy named Andy Zebrowitz. He was one of those people that looked like trouble, but he was always a good friend to me. Not in the overly friendly, I'd do anything for you way, but in a quiet way where he'd do it anyway, while acting gruff. The best way I can describe it is like Dr. House. He was smart and cool and I didn't have a crush on him, just sort of hero worship. He was that guy that you knew that was so cool you'd tell people you knew him. That kind of thing.

He used to fix my computer for me sometimes, when I couldn't figure it out myself. And I used to bring him cookies and pizza (when I worked at a pizza place) and Thanksgiving Dinner leftovers... I never heard one way or the other if he had Thanksgiving plans but he never turned down the food and always gave the Tupperware back clean. One time I randomly asked him if he'd like to go to the Renaissance Festival and when I went to pick him up in the morning he'd gotten a new computer the night before and stayed up all night playing with it. I think he'd gone to bed about half an hour before I showed up and when he answered the door it was clear he'd forgotten about the whole thing. I felt like this goofy kid- like I was bothering him- but he just said he needed a shower and a cup of coffee and we could go.

Before I went to Italy I asked him if he wanted anything from over there. I don't think he ever got back to me, and I didn't pick anything up for him. I remember a winter or two ago I said I'd knit him some gloves and he sortof said what kind he'd like- fingerless, black, long cuffs- but I never did get around to making them. We didn't talk all that much.

And then before I knew it it was this summer and I was going to head to London and it struck me if I hadn't gotten him anything from Italy I could get him something from London and we could hang out at least once more. Something like that. And at the time I was thinking it I also thought it had been a while since I'd seen him online. And he's one of those people, like me, always on.

I checked IM and he wasn't on. I just sort of thought he might have shut it off or was doing something to his computer but when I checked his blog I saw his obituary. I thought it was a joke for about fifteen minutes- I had to do some googling to see what was going on- we mostly knew each other online and didn't have any mutual friends. He'd died a few days before my birthday, about five months earlier. It was like a gut punch. I know, sort of a bit much of a reaction to an internet friend dying who I hadn't seen in years- but- Andy was one of those people... Who make a difference for you even though they don't do much of anything. He was a decent guy when I didn't seem to know any of that variety.

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Books, books, books.

I picked up Anne Macaffrey's Crystal Singer last week at Book Exchange. Normally I give books the 50 page test that I learned from Charles- the first fifty pages were just kind of... Sleepy isn't the right word, but I wasn't excited about anything Killashandra was up to either. But I couldn't stop reading it either. I think I'm about 3/4 the way through it and I don't want to read it anymore, but I do. I guess Killashandra isn't very interesting, but Anne's writing is very good.

Then I picked up Dracula, My Love by Syrie James which is a retelling of Dracula from Mina's POV. I'm only about a hundred pages in, but it's a good read. Not YOU HAVE TO READ THIS yet, but it's amusing.

And last night I noticed that Clive Barker's Absolute Midnight which is the third book in the Abarat series was supposed to be out last month. I think it was also supposed to be out last month last year. Come on Clive, put the book out- there's not even any fanfic I know of to bridge the gaps.